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Saturday, July 23, 2011

Driving to Outerspace in My '02 Chevy Malibu

             


       By now most of you probably know about the end of the NASA space shuttle program. Basically what has happened is that Obama, like a total dipshit, has put forth a new space exploration proposal that does not include the glorious winged symbols of freedom we natural-born Americans have lovingly called "shuttles," and NASA, like a bunch of pussies, has just sat back and let him.




       When I called the White House and demanded and explanation for this blatant socialism, they told me that Obama was not available for comment. I'm sure he was busy doing something really important, like purchasing guano for his organic garden or some other stately presidential type shit.




       But they took the time to explain to me some of the details of his awesome policies and the super-sound logic behind them.  What I basically got from the conversation is that he does it all for the nookie, but I wasn't paying very close attention because I was doing my Wii Fit and wondering what was going to happen on Housewives later. That's The Real Housewives of Orange County for anyone who happens to be a fucking idiot.
       But I do remember seeing on Fox News--and being completely outraged--that he was also doing away with the Constellation program, which was going to put Americans back on the moon. I mean we're trying to feel superior to other countries, here, Nobama. Our people need that. And don't forget it's we the people, or have you ever even read that document?




       But get this shit: NASA is instead going to use their funding to do things like put astronauts on an asteroid by 2025. I mean what the fuck is the point of putting people on some cold dead rock roughly the size of Mount Everest that is hurtling through the Solar System at thousands of miles an hour on a trajectory that could intersect with Earth's orbit at some point? Just what are they hoping to achieve and/or avoid?


likethatwouldeverhappen.jpg

       Well the whole thing just sounded kinda pointless to me and it was around that time that I just decided fuck it, I'm going to space. I didn't have a spacecraft per se so I would have to get creative. What I did have was my trusty dusty 2002 Chevy Malibu. Clearly it was time for some Back to the Future shit.


My shit looks just like this, except it's missing a hubcap.

        So what I did was I strapped a fucking rocket to that bitch. NASA had a bunch of them left over from their now-defunct space shuttle program.




       If my calculations were correct, this, along with my Malibu's powerful V6, would make it possible for me to escape the earth's atmosphere and gravitational pull, and from there it would be a smooth and also cost effective trip. Because there is no air or whatever in space, there is barely any wind resistance, so a gallon of gas would last me for roughly 50 blagillion miles.




       My final destination would of course be the moon, but I had a few stops to make along the way. Call it some "unfinished business" if you will. As I loaded up the trunk of my space vehicle with Spam and tomato juice and a few other provisions, I reflected on my mission and the challenges I would face. Those of you who have been to space before know what a cruel mistress she can be. But I vowed to overcome that vile bitch and slap the shit out of her with a little bit of modern ingenuity, and then I would backhand that malevolent whore with some good old fashioned determination. Come to think of it, this shit was going to be fun.









       The first place I stopped was the International Space Station. This is where our good decent American astronauts are made to live together and cooperate with shifty malodorous foreigners from Russia, Europe, and Japan, and they are made to follow their unsavory foreign customs such as not taking showers and shitting into a tube. As a patriotic American I was upset about this, so what I did was I drove my Malibu right into the side of that fucker. I hope that panel wasn't important you Marxist sons of bitches, because now it's space junk. Then as I was pulling away I put my ass out the window and took a shit on their antenna thingy.



       It didn't occur to me until later that Space Ghost was probably in there, too, and if he happens to be reading this, I do apologize for getting a little carried away.



Zorak, you can eat a dick.




       The next logical stop on my journey was probably the most overhyped and arrogant planet in the entire Solar System, Saturn. This obnoxious and untalented Kim Kardashian of a planet thinks it's so fucking special because it got fucked in the ass by some semi-famous asteroid and it was featured in The Sun. Big fucking deal, you're a gaudy slut, Saturn. So I pulled out my space balls and teabagged that skank.




       As I was driving by the Hubble I just had to laugh. My five-year-old nephew's iPhone 4 has like ten times more pixels than that dinosauric piece of shit.




       To me, Jupiter is sort of like the homely, moon-faced sister of Saturn, who gains a moderate amount of attention from the sleazier of the press by virtue of her repugnant arriviste of a sister who granted is considerably easier on the eyes making a name for herself by being a shameless comet-dumpster. Your parents should really be proud of you guys. Oh wait, they're just as big of whores as you are.




       As I ventured further out into the recesses of space, I came across an Earth-like planet in the habitable zone of a star system I named "Awesome 420." I decided to take a pit stop and just chill for a minute, have a Slim Jim in remembrance of Macho Man Randy Savage and get out and have a stretch and maybe do a few jumping jacks, because I had been in the car for several hours at that point. I found this kick ass beach with a clear view of several planets and celestial bodies, just like you would think there would be, and decided to go for a swim. It turned out not to be water but liquid methane, and when I got out I smelled like the worst fart imaginable. I still had a lot of pent up energy from all of those energy drinks, so I said fuck it I might as well dig for some unobtainium.




       However, I soon became bored with that pursuit. So I went for a drive through the countryside, past crystal mountains and gaseous forests, past metallic glaciers and a lake that looked exactly like Spike Lee, no shit, and through a field of hundred-foot-high translucent flowers that sang in castrato when you brushed against them. It was there that I encountered the Sages of the Brown Eye, an ancient but somewhat silly people who considered their own sphincters to be sacrosanct.





       It was clear after a short time that I had worn out my welcome when they unceremoniously commanded me to get off their rhombus of rainbow ferns. I wasn't terribly upset about that, so I drove down to a valley of silken pinwheels where I encountered a much cooler people I dubbed the Murder Junkies.





       But unfortunately I couldn't stay with them long, because of this weird storm that developed, the kind that you would only see when visiting an alien world. My space peeps will know exactly what I'm talking about.





       So sadly I was forced to get the fuck out of that planet. It was time for me to push on toward my final destination. After all, the point of this whole trip was to land on the moon, and that was still several kabillion light years away, and to make matters worse I only had two-thirds of a tank left. But luckily I remembered this shortcut through a wormhole that my niggas the Murder Junkies had told me about.




       When I came out the other side of the wormhole, I found myself on the outskirts of the universe. And to make matters worse it was the middle of the night. But there in the hazy distance I could make out the moon, shining brightly through the stardust and nebulae and what not. It ought to have been bright; it was the size of several galaxies. In my excitement I put the pedal to the metal and within three shakes of Orion's tail I was approaching the lunar surface.







       I had always thought of the moon as an almost eerily peaceful sort of place, which is why I was so surprised at the absolute shit show of bloody intergalactic war going on there. There was total pandemonium and lawlessness wherever I turned. Roving gangs were out in the streets, drinking Moloko Plus and smoking moon rocks and committing acts of ultraviolence such as flicking people in the ear and arbitrarily giving out purple nurples. It was horrific. I knew something had to be done, but I was going to need back up.




       No sooner did I think that than did I see a glorious gallant bald eagle flying down out of the sky. Then I squinted my eyes and saw that it was not a bald eagle but was in fact the biggest, baddest, most phallic and aggressive space shuttle I had ever seen in my life. And I saw that it was not so much flying as it was tearing the fucking sky in half. It swooped down at roughly double the speed of light and landed, the latch opened up and out popped a familiar face. It was my homeboy Rafa.



 
       And I was all like "Awww shit what da bizness is fool." And he was all "Awww you know just gettin Buck Rogers in this bitch. I heard you was like in some trouble n shit. You know you my blood and all so I gotcha back." And I was all like "mah nigga." But then he was all like "But that's not all fool. You know I gotcha girl Lemons ridin shotgun in this bitch."



 
       To which I was all like "Oooohhh, snap." And homegirl was like "I ain't come to this triflin ass muthufucka to be runnin my muthufuckin mouth with you fools. I came to do some 187's in this bitch." Then she pulled out her space gat and started shooting muthufuckas. And then out of nowhere someone started whispering "let the bodies hit the floor" and then I realized it was that song by Drowning Pool. Usually that song isn't really my cup of tea, but in this instance it was strangely appropriate.
      Well between the three of us we had soon piled the bodies ten deep for as far as the eye could see, and the war they were having was officially over since we had killed almost every motherfucker in that bitch. But the two evil masterminds behind the whole thing were wounded and cowering before us begging for their lives. They were Yuri Gagarin and Franklin Delano Roosevelt. FDR was all like "In the name of socialism, I beg of you to spare me," and Gagarin was blubbering away in some bullshit language that I couldn't  understand.




       But I was like "Nah, fuck all that son, this is the land of the free." Then I popped like infinity capitalistic caps in their asses.



       But we still weren't quite sure that the conflict was over and a peaceful resolution had been reached, so as we were flying away we found the deepest lunar cave in the world and dropped a nuclear warhead in that motherfucker. Then we soared off into the sunset as the moon cracked open and exploded.



THE END




195 comments:

  1. haha this is genious!!!! love the NASA rocket

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  2. somebody needs to make this into a short film

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  3. LOL!!!!!...Man!...you can write some hilarious shit. :D

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  4. Finnaly something interesting to see in the internet! congrats for the post!

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  5. I can't believe I read that LOL! It was enjoyable. Btw is it really true that they stopped NASA? Wth that's totally dumb -_-.

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  6. Like yourself I too have a chevy malibu. I have long held out hope that this car would prove to be useful one day. You sir, have restored my hope.

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  7. Way to go! show those lil skank space thinguies something something how the land of free rules

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  8. I'm not really sure what I read, but after reading it I totally shat a cosmic rainbow. True story.

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  9. The epicness of this story is unparalleled. They should totally send you to outer space!

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  10. So the job hunt is going well then? :)

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  11. Wow, definitely worth the read! hahaha

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  12. @leanmeansteen, yes, but more to the point, someone needs to give a million dollars for this post.
    @jeff, and don't I know it.
    @msmariah, whatever you dream, your malibu can do.
    @lolmudkipz101, they stopped the space shuttle program. NASA is immortal and will never die, but there can be only one.
    @Punk1119, pics or it didn't happen.
    @Kimberly, NASA will not return my calls, nor did they respond to my 27 page letter. I suspect they were put off by the fact that I wrote the first half in crayon and the rest in bodily fluids.
    @Heidi, no, this is what I've been doing instead, because I'm a loser. I keep hoping that someone will like give me a bag of money or something. But in seriousness I have enough saved to last me for a little while so I'm not too worried just yet.

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  13. How far will a '95 Subaru Impreza get me? Because I'd like to take a baller trip to Awesome 420

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  14. At least eleventy blagillion miles my man. You could make it there and back in time for dinner.

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  15. haha, obama on facebook, yay! :D

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  16. lolwut?
    PEOPLE DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU ARE HIGH. YOU'LL PROBABLY DIE. lol

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  17. Don't worry, i'm sure privatized space exploration will have plenty of awesome missions that search deep into the universe to find out how they can rape the resources of distant planets as well.

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  18. God... I don't know what have I read here... I just went reading and finished it. Reading again.

    I like your blogin style. I'll follow you.

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  19. Good god, this was the funniest thing I read today. You're a brilliant writer + epic pics you got with it

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  20. Awesome 420 is by far the best name in space.

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  21. I never would have guessed The Rock would be President.

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  22. The Kim Kardashian of planets? Too true, and I'm glad to have you point it out to the rest of the bitch-ass universe.

    Also, your Malibu has a V6? So fucking jealous.

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  23. I need that bender helmet so much

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  24. You should get some funny captions for your pics!

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  25. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  26. I really like this, especially the pics.

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  27. I don't know why I drink any sort of liquid (or non liquid, that's weird) when I read your posts.

    "That's The Real Housewives of Orange County for anyone who happens to be a fucking idiot."

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  28. I gotta say that I found one or two inconsistencies in your story that tell me that this might not have happened. The first thing I found was the fact that if you had actually teabag Saturn, your scrotum would've been ripped from your body by the fierce gravitational and methane-based winds. The second thing is that Jupiter is actually Saturn's boyfriend.... He's just kinda emo...

    But other than that I'm glad you got back safe, and thanks for saving us from the interstellar war and shit!

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  29. Yo I can't believe I got to this party so late!! (FUCKING SUMMER AT THE BEACH) This was pure madness from the launch and on. Truly awesome shit. As soon as I get a chance I'll be back posting..this was way too cool! Thanks for the shout.

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  30. You need to pick me up next time you go for a ride. I'd like to visit that "awesome 420" place. Not every day you see a tornainbow. At least not here on earth.

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  31. pure LULZ my friend. I'm sure the future of private/corporate space exploration will revolve heavily on your breakthrough in V6 maned space exploration!

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  32. Rofl. I have no words. I think I peed my pants laughing though. Thanks for the follow. I am following back :D

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  33. Lulzy story.Followed:P

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  34. Damn, I missed this blog. Straight blog genius.

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  35. Americans jealous that Chinese will go to the moon first?

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  36. Be aware of the torniambow!

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  37. possibly one of the funniest things i have ever read. I'm english but i still believe that obama is a complete dick for removing the use of the shuttles

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  38. I totally agree with everything in this post! I can't believe how little importance (and funds) the us is giving to NASA lately, it's crazy, especially when china is totally space gung ho and want to have a base on the moon within 30 years lol

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  39. Hey thanks for the visit...You've got a great blog yourself. +followed

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  40. THIS. IS. BRILLIANT.

    Thanks for including me in this epic story of your travels.

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  41. I agree with the other comments. Make this into a film pronto! And thanks for the nice comment too, I'm glad you liked the squirrel photos, haha. It is a shame that people rank death but there you go. xxx

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  42. omg thank you so much for the great time i had reading it, the pictures are to funny sometimes ^^

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  43. this post made me lol pretty hard. thanks for this.

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  44. There's so much going on in this post where do I begin? Why are you so angry with planets xD

    This post did make me laugh the entire time. It's been a while hah

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  45. Hahaha that's so funny...
    The picture of the spaceship is good too :D

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  46. Wow, you're funny. And quite possibly insane. My 8-yr-old daughter is rehearsing for a play and the line "well it's not like we can just take a 1981 Delorean and fill it with plutonium and drive 88 mph into the future, right?" is giving her trouble. I think I... won't show her this.

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  47. Hey man, I feel strongly about this issue as well. I however believe that the private sector will do a better job than the bureaucrats at NASA could ever do. Sorry, but IMO money is a great incentive for improvements.

    check this out: http://i.imgur.com/msXS8.jpg

    Thanks for the post. Feel free to check out my blog -- I have rewarded your kindne$$ in advance, hope you'll return the favor(:

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  48. As always, this post was both entertaining and fun to read, but also interesting!

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  49. Aw man, how could you've possibly missed Uranus?

    There is so much left to be explored...

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  50. This is without a doubt the most amusing post I have seen on a blog in a long time! This should be a short film.

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  51. That's one epic saga you penned write there.

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  52. really thorough description and I love your writing style, very entertaining! good post :)

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  53. Move over Douglas Adams, there's a new kid in town. :) Seriously, good job!

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  54. This is a hell of a post! You should write a book!

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  55. Yes I agree with comment above...how did you miss Uranus?

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  56. Just wanted to let you know... your mom's dildo is ready. How many times have I heard that?

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  57. You are posted under my crush-of-the-week button. Behind the picture of the frightening dog. It's supposed to be a good thing, cause you're fucking hilarious, so yeah.

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  58. This was an epic post man. Keep it up!

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  59. Neil Degrasse Tyson for president! It'll get us into space at least. :P

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  60. Motherfucka-ng great post.

    Though I find the whole "teabagging Saturn" part a little hard to believe. Only because gravity is a bitch.

    Or, so I've heard.

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  61. Wow! I REALLY liked this page! Scrolling down it was a blast.

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  62. They finished your mom's dildo HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA Followed! man...followed.

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  63. Wow, this is a freakin' epic blog post. Good going man! I love some of those pictures, especially the Obama one xD

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  64. Ah man, these posts do an excellent job of cracking me up. Can't stop laughing!

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  65. I saw you followed me so I thought I'd check out your page, and I'm glad I did. Great story, and a great choice of pictures along with it. I could see Quentin Tarantino making a film out of this. Followed.

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  66. Hahaha, nice post, man.
    When will you do this journey? Be sure to call me. Can't wait to go. lol

    keep posting hilarious stuff, cause I'll get back to read it and support.

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  67. U gotta a pretty random blog, I like it!

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  68. Loved the Bender hat. Nice trip.

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  69. Funny post, Interesting to read, reading through your archives now but there's a lot.
    +Follow
    Within the next few years corporations will completely take over space travel, and then visiting relatives on space stations will be similar to getting on a plane to go to another country, it will just be a rocket instead...

    On a personal note:
    http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-M4Q1FftXmv4/TipxB5EpVMI/AAAAAAAAARU/No4HYHlOPjU/s1600/hubble-ultra-deep.jpg The full version of that photo is my desktop wallpaper right now, hahaha. What are the odds?

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  70. Real question is when is my dildo going to be ready.

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  71. haha i have got 5$ with you're name on it!
    great post!

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  72. I knew a bit about that image, but I had never seen that .gif about the photo, thanks for sending me that link, it was pretty interesting.

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  73. now i want a pic on faceinhole ^^

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  74. We NEED better space exploration.

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  75. oh wow hi thanks for following my blog :) :) shall check out yours soon!

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  76. He shouldn't be on Facebook, that's for sure =p
    +followed

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  77. I never thought I would go to my grave saying I wish I had read more about space exploration. But it just might say that on my tombstone. Great blogstuff. +followed

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  78. Not only did I +follow but ... you are my 100th blog reader ... so, you were justly rewarded:

    http://coffeeyogurt.blogspot.com/2011/07/ding-ding-ding-my-100th-follower.html

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  79. 97 Fucking comments??? Why am I even here? Well...for one...because they are all short little dribbles of a response, where as mine will be poorly worded, misspelled, and well...tispy. (It is, afterall, 5:00 PM here and therefore well into happy hour.)

    So, I don't really give a shit about the space program, no matter where you decide to launch towards. Stop spending my hard earned money on space. I don't care. I don't want to live on the moon or anywhere I have to wear a helmet outside (hat hair...hellloooo). I want you to put my dollars back into the earth I live on. But that's just me. Not an Obama fan. Not a pan of politics in the least. Is this a political blog???? Yikes, I'm in trouble. Are you into math? I'll kill myself now....slow...and on video. Ha!

    Okay, all kidding (no, I was comletely serious) thank you for stopping my my music blog. Sure sight better than the poetry blog eh? *snort*

    Yes, I was snorting. This was riotously (is that a word?) funny. Thank you. I needed a good laugh today. Take the lead out of my serious side :)

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  80. @t Jeff,
    Yup, so true^^
    Amazing gifs as always. Made my day. Thx

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  81. Explosive funny stuff dude +1

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  82. Ahaha man that is awesome! :')
    Well worth the read, and the pictures made it way better o;
    Nice blog too btw!

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  83. Haha, oh my god that was great!

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  84. The guy in the first gif is what I looked like after reading this XD. Good Job.

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  85. Could never be her mild companion. Following!

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  86. Well that was like not the longest post I read :P, nice post man, real good.

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  87. Hilarious and weird as...
    Follow!

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  88. Wow, loved your genuine story. Very comedic, and I loved the strapping a huge rocket on that '02 Malibu hahaha. +follow, very nice!!

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  89. Really love your post, it made me laught :')
    But even if I'm not american I was kind of sad when they announced that they stopped the space shuttle program.

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  90. Epic post!!!
    Man, this is really amazing!

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  91. You Sir. Are My New Inspiration

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  92. roflcopter bool blory bro

    computerfixins.blogspot.com

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  93. great post great post! talk about captivating pictures

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  94. My favorite part was the tea-bagging Saturn with your space-balls. Truly epic journey!

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  95. Dude, wtf is that with McCain? I've seen that pic so many times, what THE F is the backstory on that shiz?

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  96. What a long post! Nice read though

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  97. Holy Crap! Awesome gifs, full of lulz, Love me some Tim and Eric! follow +1

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  98. That's a fucking post, man. Just kept going.

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  99. I facepalmed a few times on these, but very very funny :)

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  100. this had me laughing pretty good...haha
    +follow

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  101. Rofl and I'm a sucker for the puppy gifs.

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  102. I've sent that dildo pic to like 10 people.

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  103. Great post, made me laugh, I really missed this blog, but now I'm back.

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  104. Put a smile to my face on a day so gloomy. Thanks.

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  105. very classy. now i say nasa is important because of all the tech that they dont use that comes out of there makes the money we pour into the program well worth it.

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  106. Obama is never available for comment. This administration is shrouded in secrecy i tell ya.

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  107. Wow...that was quite the adventure. I think you may have a future in movies.

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  108. Lol I loved this post! I think my favorite part was that first gif waaayy in the beginning, that was just hilarious.

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  109. hahahha cool stuff... I love the design!!!

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  110. LOL nice read and pictures. +following for more

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  111. This did not suck.

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  112. That was an adventure to read! Congratz on the success on your blog, it seems you really didn't need my tips. +1 follow

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  113. My mind has exploded. Great story, sharing it with friends.

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  114. I still can't get over how insane this post is.

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  115. ahaha omfg, that is one of the funniest things I ever read. Great one, keep it up dude, deff. following

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  116. @Alphalpha, when I discovered that GIF on a certain imageboard my head exploded into candy. I can honestly say it's the greatest GIF I've ever seen. It still cracks me up.

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  117. Lmao, I enjoyed this very much. Too funny. Followed.

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  118. Lmao , oh this was to much i do want to say some things , nobama doesn't believe in organic gardens he's actually been trying to make them illegal since he got into office. Also nasa couldn't have told no even though they wanted too. Nasa is part of the military , obama is general of the military :p so they have to follow others if he says it has to be shut down. So it funny he can shut down nasa but not bring troops from Afghanistan such a fail president. Ron paul for 2012.

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  119. And to think all I ever do is sit and watch TV!

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  120. You just blew my mind.. LOUISIANA REPRESENT

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  121. I loved this. I laughed so many times. :D
    Greatness.

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  122. haha oh my god this is amazing! Keep up the good work!

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  123. Really entertaining. A good read to start the day.

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  124. DAMN! I mean, DAMN man - that was a great read!

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  125. This is brilliant XD. I'm definitely following!

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  126. all this over a car...?
    HAhahahahah

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  127. Oh god this thing was hilarious. You have a talent for stories good sir.

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  128. Hahahaha, I TOTALLY LOVE YOUR BLOG!

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  129. That is some funny shit.. thanks for coming by..Following now

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  130. Great post, hilarious! Following back

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  131. You might actually be insane... but I like the gif of Eric Wareheim you started out with, and the little daschund digging on the bed...

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  132. Thanks for the follow, hay bales are quite fantastic. You seem insane, but it's engaging. You should take this political quiz just for kicks: http://www.gotoquiz.com/politics/political-spectrum-quiz.html

    I posted it on my blog a week ago or so. I'd like to see where you lie on the spectrum too!

    Cheers,
    nicole.

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  133. This is so fucking hilarious I can't even write you a comment. I laughed, I cried, I shit my pants.

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  134. Well, you're certainly different.

    I was fascinated by your tale. Imagination running riot inside a space helmet. Presumably, you were wearing one?

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  135. HAhahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahA! I adore imaginations and the perfect placement if volucabulary Not to mention a complete story and keeping my attention and all the rest of the lovely chuckles and kind. Too much fun. Dearly want to come back for the next one.

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  136. I was wondering what happened to that damn moon...

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  137. Did you see the aliens from Space Jam too?

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  138. If you're talking about Marvin the Martian yes, in fact we had brunch.

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  139. Whoah shit I'm gonna have tons of terrible/lovely dreams about that tornainbow!
    Following for more epicness

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  140. I'm seriously considering making this into a movie, this is fantastic hahaah

    Followed + Supported

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  141. Epic post, funny, interesting and informative. Thanks man, seriously!

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  142. LOL, that's amazing. This reminds me of the opening to Heavy Metal. But come on, Zorak is awesome.

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  143. it was funny, then it kept going, then it was still funny

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  144. FUN!!!

    Hah that's my new curse word

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  145. Awesome post!

    Still, I don't mind us giving up on space shuttles. How much more can our scientists learn by doing experiments in zero gravity?

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  146. Winner winner chicken dinner

    I forgot to add you to my new revised blogroll. You have definitely attained triple OG status in my eyes.

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  147. I had this EXACT dream last night! Only it was Obama's dildo, and the furry, lemming like thing was actually running out of his ass screaming, " Yo nigga, WTF?! I don't see no mother fucking rainbows! Socialist liar!" And then it was the lemming that took a dump on the space station, and rode back to Earth on Zorak singing Devo's "Mexican Radio".

    Are you sure you aren't my love child via some hazy, promiscuous rompings during Marti Gras years back?
    If you were, I would tell you to take over the world, because you're a fucking literary genius.
    If not ... well, maybe lay off the moon rock, but only for an afternoon.

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  148. God I wish you could turn the posts out more frequently! Quality takes time, and you are pure quality!

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  149. Epic post, that Zorak line caught me off guard lol. Also wondering what this 'unfinished business' is you speak of.

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  150. Dude, heads up, I just saw that you have 30k views. You are doing something right. :O

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  151. always get some good laughs out of your posts :)

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  152. This is a pretty good compilation.

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